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Empty Nest Magazine
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Real People Empty Nesting: An Interview with Leslie Hawke by Robin Bonner
An Empty-Nest Calling So, in 2000, Leslie joined the Peace Corps and asked to go to Romania. And, she stayed. In 2005, the U.S. Agency for International Development (USAID) awarded Leslie its Outstanding Citizen Achievement Citation for her work. As a model empty nester who successfully launched a second, fulfilling career (her son is screen and stage star, writer, and director Ethan Hawke), Leslie has agreed to share her thoughts and advice with Empty Nest readers. EN: Leslie, briefly describe your pre–Ovidiu Rom professional life—what personal goals did you have when you were younger? Did they change as you approached midlife? If so, why and how? LH: Actually, I have always been conflicted about making money versus doing something more worthwhile with my time. Business afforded me a nice lifestyle and allowed me to send my son to good schools, but I always felt ambivalent about spending my life that way. Lucky for me, my son became self-sufficient at a relatively early age (18), and that gave me the financial freedom to consider doing something different with my life. And, being single, I didn’t have to talk anybody else into the idea! I feel incredibly fortunate to have found work that makes me feel useful and productive. I have purpose in Romania, and there’s no question but that my skills are more valuable here, because not as many Romanians have experience as social change agents. My background in business and nonprofit management in New York serves me very well. Frankly, there are a lot of people in America who have these skills. So it is more rewarding to use them here, where they are not as common yet, and to train younger Romanians. Education and jobs have always been the issues I am most passionate about. I think I inherited that from my grandmother, who grew up in poverty in northern Alabama and then lived through the Great Depression. EN: Was your decision to live in Romania a difficult one? Do you ever look back?
LH: I joined the Peace Corps as a kind of lark. I was tired of my job, my childrearing years were behind me, I was single, I knew enough about international development to know that I couldn’t possibly accomplish anything significant in a couple of years—and from very early on, I felt as though I did indeed have something to offer. But curiously, staying in Romania never really seemed like a decision I made; it was more like an outcome I observed happening. After 9 months, I sold my apartment in New York City, not because I planned to stay in Romania, but because subletting my co-op apartment was complicated. I knew I didn’t want to go back to work for a corporation and, consequently, I would never be able to afford my old lifestyle again, at least not in New York! The way it unfolded reminds me of the way you hear a lot of novelists describe their writing: One thing just led to another. I’ve been here 10 years, and I hope to be here at least another 10. EN: Ovidiu Rom has been in existence now for 5 years. What goals have been met, what projects are in the works, and how successful do you feel you’ve been?
LH: I started these programs with a Romanian teacher, Maria Gheorghiu, while I was a Peace Corps volunteer. When my Peace Corps service ended in 2004, Today our primary focus is on pressing the Romanian government to implement on a national scale the measures we have been using over the past 9 years to enroll and keep disadvantaged children in school. For example, you have to go door to door in the poorest parts of town to recruit the most vulnerable children for school. You have to gain the trust of parents. You have to assist them with the increased financial burden that school entails. You have to help them overcome their fear of school authorities. You have to train teachers to deal with an influx of ill-prepared children. It’s not rocket science, but it is multifaceted and requires different government agencies to work in concert. This is not something they are accustomed to doing. EN: How often are you able to see your family, especially your grandchildren? What creative ways do you have for keeping in touch? LH: I recently started using Skype and it is a great way to keep in touch. I was able to watch my youngest granddaughter take some of her first steps across the kitchen floor last month, for instance. I see my grandchildren three or four times a year, usually for a week at a time—which is not the same as Sunday dinner 50 weeks a year—but it’s not all that bad, as geographically extended American families go, especially now with Skype. EN: What advice can you give empty nesters on “making a difference”? About discovering opportunities available to them, for either an altruistic second career or volunteer work?
LH: My favorite saying is “Do the good you have the power to do.”
Links: Robin Bonner is editor of Empty Nest. For more about Robin, see About Us |
Empty Nest: A Magazine for Mature Families
© 2009 Spring Mount Communications
Hawke is also president and founder of The 
and the Peace Corps seemed like a pretty easy way to try something different, and also a pretty easy thing to get out of, if it turned out to be a mistake. I’d always been attracted to the idea of living abroad but had never done it. Once I got to Romania, I discovered that my American “can do” spirit and life experience really were valuable assets in Eastern Europe.
Maria and I started our own nongovernmental organization (NGO), Ovidiu Rom. Our purpose was always to get severely impoverished children into school at the optimal age (i.e., as early as other kids) and help them succeed. Originally, in addition to children’s educational services, the project included a mother’s training program based on the Doe Fund’s Ready, Willing and Able program for homeless men in New York. Working with the mothers was very effective but hard to finance after USAID pulled out of Romania. (It’s much easier to raise money that directly aids children rather than indirectly helping them through their parents. This is a shame because helping their parents to become better parents is more crucial to a child’s development than after-school activities. But it’s also more expensive! We now give parents economic incentives to increase their children’s attendance at school and their own attendance at monthly PTA meetings.)
When I went to Romania, I discovered, to my own surprise, that I really had a lot to contribute. I would have been pretty useless there at the age of 25, so it’s just as well that I didn’t join the Peace Corps back then. But at 48, with 25 years of experience in business and on fundraising and nonprofit boards, I was in a good position to help Romanian NGOs in their planning, fundraising, and project development. And I discovered that I really enjoy the life of an “expat.” My advice to empty nesters is “go for it.” I see a lot of couples pursuing this avenue with international volunteer organizations, and, as an added benefit, it seems to be a great tonic for their relationship.