Wedding Bells at a Distance

Planning a Destination Wedding—Conclusion
continued...

By Robin Bonner

Countdown: The Wedding Week
We planned to leave for Maine late in the afternoon of October 9. It was crazy trying to get out of the house. A computer virus set us back a bit the week before, and I labored to get my work projects in order so they could be put on hold for a week. I had plenty with me to do on the 12-hour car ride up and then back, but there would be no time for work while we were away! We had an ambitious schedule.

Tuesday evening/Wednesday morning: Driving (we would stay overnight near Boston Tuesday night, to break up the trip).

Wednesday: We checked in at the Ledgelawn B&B in Bar Harbor and picked up items for the favors and welcome bags: chocolate-covered blueberries, pretzels, pretzel dips, and more. Amie and Todd were flying into Boston on Tuesday evening, renting a car, and driving the 5 to 6 hours to Bar Harbor. They would pick up their marriage license and help with the errands. The plan was to assemble the welcome bags Wednesday evening and drop them off at local hotels to greet wedding guests upon their arrival. This meant we had to track everyone’s lodging plans ahead of time. We had dinner at Galyn’s, one of our favorite spots, and spent the evening putting together the welcome bags.

Thursday: After breakfast, we drove down to the Asticou to meet with Tom Weverstad, and Connie and John Wesley, who checked in late the night before. Tom was delayed, so we spent some time visiting with the Wesleys and walking around the grounds, checking out the layout for the wedding. Eventually, we finalized details for the ceremony and reception with Tom, then the guys drove out to Ellsworth to check on their tuxes, and Amie, Grandmom, and I got some lunch, dropped off a few welcome bags (while the guys headed out to drop off the bulk of them), and headed back to Bar Harbor, where Sarah and her wedding guest and long-time friend Ian McCafferty would be connecting with us. Ian was a doll to pick up Sarah at school in New York City and drive her up to Bar Harbor for the wedding, which saved us from having to figure out the logistics of her taking a bus.

For dinner, we met with part of the Wesley group: John and daughter Gwynne (Connie stayed behind to pick up other family members at the airport) and had dinner at Chowdah’s, formerly the Maine Street Restaurant, our favorite venue for lobster since the kids were small. The prices were right and the food ample. Thursday night we spent putting together the favors: chocolate-covered blueberries in little plastic bags, wrapped in white tulle and tied with ribbons of teal and wine. The label tied down by the ribbon told the story:

Amie & Todd
October 13, 2007

They were adorable, but we were so very sick of them by the time we finished them. Grandmom was especially glad to see the end of them, as she had begun cutting ribbons for them in the car Wednesday morning!

Friday: We awoke to blinding, bone-chilling rain. We hadn’t been to Thunder Hole yet, so we decided it was as good a time as any. Checking out of the B&B in the rain was no fun, but that’s what we did. (Note for next time: Just stay at the Asticou the whole time to avoid all the check-ins and check-outs!) We headed to our favorite spot on the island, hoping to find enormous waves. We were disappointed in that, but the coast was still beautiful, as always. We climbed around as much as we dared and shot photos of the turbulent surf.

Soon, it was time to split up: The guys would again go out to Ellsworth. Adjustments had been made and the tuxes could be picked up. The plan was for them to meet the rest of the groomsmen there, as well. We girls would head to Jordan Pond House for Amie’s treat: the bridal luncheon (she was nice enough to invite Mom and Grandmom, as well). Maggie and Liz, now on the island, joined us. Once we all managed to get there and to dry off, we enjoyed the restaurant’s rustic ambience and wonderful soups and popovers (the specialty there). The popovers at Jordan Pond House had become one of our family’s traditions years ago. In having the luncheon there, Amie humored Sarah, who was pining for the popovers.

Before we knew it, we were back at the Asticou, checking into our rooms. Sarah met with the tenor, a student from the College of the Atlantic (in Bar Harbor), to rehearse the wedding song. The rest of us prepared for the rehearsal and the dinner that would follow. Out-of-town guests began to arrive—my brother and his family from New Jersey, my sister and her daughters from Florida, Gary’s brother and his family from Connecticut. It was hard to believe the Big Day was nearly upon us!

At 4:00 p.m., Reverend Dieterich led the rehearsal in a side room of the inn—no chance to rehearse on the lawn in all that blinding rain! Although the bridal party had to imagine what it would be like to walk down the Asticou’s back lawn, spots were assigned, the order of the ceremony was discussed, and everyone felt a little more comfortable with what would happen the next day. Afterward, we headed out to a lovely dinner hosted by the Wesleys at Guinness & Porcelli’s in Bar Harbor. There they displayed photos of Amie and Todd growing up, and we all told stories of their childhoods, their interests, how they met, and so on. It was a lot of fun and a good chance for both families to get to know one another a bit before the wedding day.

The Big Day
I awoke very early on Saturday. When we turned out the lights the night before, we had opened the shades, so we would be greeted in the morning by the spectacular view of Northeast Harbor from our window. I opened my eyes to see the first morning light steal across the sky and illuminate on one side the boat masts sitting still in the harbor. It was just lovely. And there was not a cloud in the sky! What does it feel like to awake on your child’s wedding day? Amie was our first to be married, and it was a time of wonder. All her life, as it turns out, she was traveling toward this day. When you join your life with another’s, it takes on a decided direction. It will be interesting to see where this wedding leads for Amie, and for all of us.

Gary was still asleep, and I just sat and stared out that window at the harbor below. This was the day we had worked so hard toward. And it would be a beautiful one, after all. Amie and Todd had so wanted an outdoor wedding. We had our doubts about pulling one off in Maine in October. I had no doubts that Amie and Todd belonged together, though, and that had been comforting during all the planning. It was a gift to be in such a lovely place with a few moments to have some quiet thoughts before the chaos of all the activity began to sweep us along. So much to think about on that special day! I showered and took a walk downstairs and out onto the grounds of the inn. It was a bit brisk yet, that early, but it was just lovely. With no rain and no clouds, surely it would warm up enough for the girls to forgo their shawls for the ceremony . . . my thoughts wandered.

Everyone enjoyed a buffet brunch and split up once again. The girls drove down to Bar Harbor to the Roberto Hoskins Salon to have their hair done (and Amie her makeup). We enjoyed our ride in Amie and Todd’s rental car, a white Ford Mustang convertible! Everything went well at the salon—we were finished almost on time, everyone’s hair looked great, and Amie was a riot in her sunglasses and veil (which we let Roberto place and we didn’t dare move). At one point, we had to hide from Todd and some of the wedding guests while Sarah ran into one of the stores and we waited for her in the car.

Back at the inn, the next couple of hours were a whirl. We looked over our notes on the ceremony and reception. My friend Clare had supervised the setting up of the centerpieces in the dining room, the cake and flowers arrived, guests arrived, Sarah and I practiced “Ave Maria” (which we would sing again a short time later, at the ceremony), and we rushed to dress and meet with the photographer in Amie’s room. Gary photographed the dining room set up so beautifully and the arrival of the guests. He almost forgot to don his tux!

The Ceremony
Tom called up to our room to say it was time to come down. This was it! We walked gingerly down the steps (in all our finery) to the Asticou’s main lobby area, then back to the porch. We peeked down at the mum gardens, the white arch framing the ceremony area, Reverend Dieterich and the guys standing and smiling, and rows of guests in white chairs all looking up at us. Gary’s 10-year-old nephew Matthew (the junior groomsman) seated Grandmom. Todd’s mom arrived at her seat on the arm of Drennan, Todd’s brother and best man, with Todd’s dad walking behind. Then it was my turn. Amie was nervous—I told her everything would be fine and I’d see her down there. I walked slowly down the steps and the grassy path, hanging onto Gary’s arm. I didn’t realize my heels were so high and the ground so uneven. The walk seemed to take forever. I had but one thought: Don’t trip! Then the girls walked slowly down, led by Rachel, my 11-year-old niece, the junior bridesmaid. Liz came next, then Sarah, then Maggie, the matron of honor. Their teal dresses, lovely hair, and stunning bouquets of bright fall flowers etched an amazing picture in my mind. It was hard to believe I wasn’t seeing all of this in some bridal magazine!

Then, Amie came down the “aisle” with Gary. Amie had been a challenging baby—as an infant, she wasn’t a sleeper. Quite often, she wanted to be held during the night, and not just held, but she wanted you to also pace back and forth with her! Gary had that job night after night, and I told him that earned his stripes to be Amie’s sole escort “down the aisle.” There always a special bond between Amie and Gary, and it was a sweet sight to see them making their way down the path together.

Reverend Dieterich welcomed everyone warmly. He talked about the Star Wars films (yes, he really did) and how the wedding was a prequel to the rest of their lives. He cued in to what I was thinking that morning—families coming together, a new family evolving from the others. He punctuated his talk with amusing anecdotes from his own family life (his son berating him for not knowing that the last couple of Star Wars films were prequels). The reverend wore white vestments embroidered in gold, which glistened in the late afternoon sun. Sarah and I sang “Ave Maria” (with me picking my new Martin guitar). The readers did their thing. Reverend Deiterich helped the bridal couple recite their vows.

Suddenly, we noticed the drone of an airplane engine. Gary and I exchanged glances and looked up. A bright yellow World War I biplane was headed our way, and as it approached the Asticou, it performed dips and dives, and generally distracted everyone from the ceremony. Was the plane’s appearance a coincidence? When it came back a second, then a third time, obviously performing a calculated fly-by, everyone began to laugh (including Reverend Dieterich, who hadn’t yet pronounced Amie and Todd husband and wife—he couldn’t get the words out of his mouth with all the distraction). In the end, we had to confess. Gary and I had set up the gig with Scenic Bi-Planes, an airplane tour company located near Bar Harbor Airport. We surprised Amie and Todd with the fly-by. (They were both completely distracted. We told them they failed the test: If faced with an airplane to watch or their own wedding to pay attention to, which would they choose? What did you expect from two such lovers of aircraft?) And the other part of their wedding gift was a flight around Mount Desert Island on the same plane. They were delighted.

The ceremony wrapped up, and the newly married couple strode up the hill while the guests blew bubbles their way for good luck. We formed a receiving line and welcomed the guests. The difficult part was over—now it was party time!

The Reception
I was surprised how quickly the evening passed. After photos for the bridal party and cocktails and hors d’oeuvres for the rest of us, the bridal party made their grand entrance. Cousin Martin asked to do the introductions and we readily agreed. The toasts by best man Drennan and matron of honor Maggie followed, and afterward we all enjoyed the most wonderful dinner. I felt as though I were floating through it all in slow motion. I kept making a mental note to take everything in. After dinner, Amie and Todd cut the flower-laden cake, and then the dancing began.

To accompany the bridal dance, Sarah, a professional singer with her sights set on Broadway, had hired a tenor to pull off a karaoke version of “Come What May,” from the film Moulin Rouge. This is the point at which I finally cried. Amie and Todd dancing, my daughter Sarah singing—it was too much! Gary and Amie, and Todd and Connie, danced next, to “Lara’s Theme” from Dr. Zhivago. I’m pretty sure I danced with my dad at our wedding to that tune; it was his favorite. It was nice to bring some elements into play that would have been meaningful to my parents, who have been gone many years now.

The guest dancing kicked off with “In the Mood,” and Gary and I were prepared! We took lessons all last year just for this moment—we threw ourselves into jitterbugging across the floor. For the first time in our marriage, we danced together in public. I couldn’t have been happier! And it was a real party crowd that we had there. Amie had requested the DJ not to force line dances on the crowd, but the guests created their own. Everyone was in a happy mood, and the little dance floor had more guests on it than off it. We danced to every favorite rock and roll song we knew, and when the DJ played Pure Prairie League’s “Amie,” Amie ran out and danced with me, just the way she did as a child. What fun! The music and dancing drew to a close promptly at 9:00 p.m., but the crowd began a rousing a cappella rendition of “Country Roads” by John Denver, one of our family favorites.

We poured into the lobby for more photos and to witness Amie throwing the bouquet off the stairway into the crowd of single female guests. Sarah caught it, much to her chagrin. Then, after cheers and some horn honking, Amie and Todd drove away in their white Mustang to some undisclosed location, and the rest of us settled into various room parties and generally to get some rest after a very exciting week!

Winding Down
We sponsored a brunch at the Asticou the next morning for any guests staying in the area (which was all of them except those leaving very early to travel home). That afternoon, a bunch of us drove down to Thunder Hole and around the island, meeting in town at the Parkside Restaurant for dinner. By that time, everyone but the core group (parents, Grandmom, and Amie and Todd) and a couple of Amie and Todd’s friends had left. It was nice to have nothing to do that evening! On Monday, we checked out of the Asticou (an arduous task—we still had so much stuff to take back with us) and met at Jordan Pond for our scheduled hike up the Bubbles, followed by tea and popovers at Jordan Pond House. Our last night on the island was spent at our new favorite B&B: the Manor House, relaxing after dinner at McKay’s Public House. It was hard to believe it was all over.

Tuesday found us checking out once again, then heading up to Ellsworth for Amie and Todd’s Scenic Bi-Plane flight around the island. We did not look forward to the long trek home. It was after midnight on Tuesday when we finally reached Spring Mount.

Just When We Thought It Was Over
Part of the plan for this destination wedding was to hold parties in Amie and Todd’s home towns, because many invited guests chose not to make the trip to Maine. It all worked out well. Amie really didn’t want a huge wedding, but 85 people in Maine and about 65 in Spring Mount on November 24 was just about right. Todd’s parents are also holding a reception for them in Vernon Hills, Illinois, on December 22.

The Spring Mount party was lovely, but crazy. We decorated with white: ribbons, streamers, balloons, candles, and flowers. I was happy with the effect. Gary set up a tent on the deck, which was warmed with a propane heater. It had the feel of an extra room, and we set the dessert and drink tables out there. Ortino’s Northside Restaurant catered the food—chicken marsala accompanied by red potatoes and green beans almondine, with baked ziti, meatballs, salad, and rolls. We also offered an hors d’oeuvres table with veggies and dip, assorted cheeses and ring bologna, and fresh fruit. We hired one of their servers, Malissa, for the evening to manage the food and drink, which freed us to visit with guests. Even so, when it was over, I felt that I hadn’t given much attention to anyone there. But it was nice to see so many come to share in the celebration.

As quickly as they came, though, the guests departed, and the wedding, for us, anyway, was officially over. After more than a year of planning, it was hard to believe! Just in time to get ready for the holiday season...