How to Cope When Your Child Studies Abroad

Continued from part one...

Preparations
Sarah had little time to get ready. She would need to report to NYU in London for orientation the morning of January 10. The NYU Special Programs Department held preparatory meetings in November and December to give students the low-down on what they needed to know to live in London. This included getting passports or visas and having letters of financial support from parents. (Immigration officials need to know that students have a means of financial support while they are staying in the U.K.) Different countries have different requirements.

Passports take at least 6 weeks to be processed (or can be rushed for an additional fee). A medical exam was also required. Specific forms had to be filled out and returned by certain dates. It was important to meet all the deadlines. Sarah moved through the mountain of paperwork systematically, fitting tasks in around her job and her school work. We kept in touch on her progress in meeting the deadlines, but she took care of most everything herself.

Sarah booked her flights, looking around for the best deal. She settled on British Airways for $468, round trip. She needed to book her return flight at the same time and plan to carry her itinerary with her, in case she was questioned. This is especially important if she should travel around Europe, say during spring break. Officials want to know that students have definite plans to return to their country of origin.

Once Sarah came home for the Christmas holidays, preparations began in earnest. She worked from her own travel packing lists and recommendations from NYU Special Programs staff. Adapters and converters for hair dryers, phone chargers, her computer, and so on, were very important. The U.K. electrical system operates at 240 volts—twice that used in the U.S. And, the plugs are shaped differently. Some appliances can operate on either voltage. If that’s the case, you only need an adapter to fit the U.S. plug into the U.K. socket. Other appliances can only operate on 120 volts; they need a converter to step the 240 volts down to 120. Plugging a 120-volt appliance directly into a 240-volt outlet can lead to an unpleasant surprise!

One more thing to watch for is that the wattage rating of the appliance does not exceed the rating of the converter (which can happen easily with hair dryers). So, to protect her appliances and to be sure she could use them without a problem, Sarah made sure she had enough converters and adapters and that the wattage of the adapters was sufficient. It sounds complicated, but it’s easy (and important) to get the hang of it!

When it came to clothes, Sarah piled her "wish pile" on a bed in a spare room. Then, she reduced it to fit into two large suitcases, checking the airline’s website for specific size and weight requirements. She learned that on the way to the U.K., she would be allowed two 70-lb suitcases, but that on her return trip, the same suitcases would have to weigh 50 lbs each! (The new weight restrictions would go into effect while she was in London.) Likewise, she could take her purse and one carry-on onto the plane with her in Philadelphia, but on her return in May, she could have only one or the other. So, she did her best to pack as lightly as possible. Of course, she needed coats, raincoats, shoes, galoshes, and stuff for an entire semester, so this proved to be no easy task.

Money: Saving It and Spending It
One way to save on the trip is to bring toiletries (shampoo, shower gel, etc.) and nonperishable food items for the entire semester, as everything will cost about double in the U.K. (This, of course, compounded the packing challenges.) At the time of this writing, the exchange rate for the U.S. dollar hovered around 2.0 (1 British pound equals about $2 U.S.). And, pricing is similar in both countries, so you can’t save anything there. Thus, shampoo that costs $4.00 in the U.S. costs about £4.00 (or about $8.00) in the U.K. Hint: If family members plan to visit at some point, have them bring along additional supplies for the remainder of the semester, as well as anything left behind.

Sarah called our credit union (we each have accounts there) and credit card companies to learn their exchange rates. It turned out that our credit union Visa had the best rate and that credit card companies, in general, got the best exchange rates. (Check your own bank and credit card companies, though, as rates can vary considerably, and some institutions also charge a "commission" for this service. Sarah opted against certain credit cards for this reason.) Sarah arranged to pay her personal credit card bill online so she wouldn’t have to receive statements or pay bills by mail, which could take too long to meet payment deadlines. She also made sure to let her credit and debit card companies know that she was going to be in Europe until May, so that they would not freeze her accounts, which they sometimes do when a purchase is made in an unusual location.

As for cash, Sarah found that it was much better to withdraw it from ATM machines than to bring it and exchange it for British currency there. Check with your bank, but you should be able to withdraw cash from your home bank account via ATM machines in London in the same way you would at home: with the same card, account number, and pin. In London, however, the machine will dispense British paper currency in various denominations. Finally, Sarah took along some American Express traveler’s checks to meet any unexpected needs (unavailability of ATMs, etc.).

One big question is: How much money should your child have put aside to spend while away? Sarah talked to friends who had studied abroad and found that their budgets varied greatly, depending on where they stayed and what they did while they were away. Sarah began, after helping with her January tuition payment, with a modest $750 of her own earnings. Holiday and birthdays from relatives brought the total up to about $1500. We decided to provide a stipend of $150 per week for food and other necessities that we could transfer electronically from our account into hers (our institution offers such an arrangement). RADA supply their students with breakfast and lunch three days a week, which would help.

Finally, to supplement her income while away, Sarah had a unique option. I run an editing business and had trained Sarah the previous summer to help me with certain tasks. We agreed that I would send her small jobs electronically whenever she had the time for them. Income from this work would add to her spending money. The projects could be done by email, so they could be sent back and forth quickly and economically. Because Sarah elected to obtain just a passport and not a work visa (which would have been more costly as well as more time consuming to process), she would be unable to work for a British business. In addition, she estimated (correctly) that she would have no time to maintain a job in addition to her studies, but she could squeeze in small electronic editing projects around her other commitments. While Sarah was in London, she wanted to also explore other European cities. The extra income would help her do that.

The Trip
The day of Sarah's departure was difficult for everyone. "Mom, you know, it’s really far," she began that morning. All her planning and packing was giving way to anxiety, which was understandable. "And, four months is a really long time." Her older sister, Amie, had spent just 8 weeks doing an internship in Paris one summer, and that seemed like an eternity to me (and to Amie). All I could do was agree with Sarah and give her a big hug. We all had concurred that Sarah should study abroad—the bigger goal—and we had to focus on that now. Sarah and I had lunch at our favorite little tea room, to break up the day, but spent most of our time packing. (I was glad my editing work schedule was light that week!) The challenge was to make sure contacts, prescriptions, and such were procured for the entire semester; everything fit in the suitcases; nothing important was left behind; and Sarah was smiling in the end.

Sarah had an overnight flight. That evening, we left the car in the airport’s short-term parking and went through check-in with her. Another student in the program was booked for the same flight, so our long goodbyes were mitigated by the arrival of Sarah’s travel companion and her parents. Without boarding passes, we were able to go only as far as security, so after more hugs and wishes for a good trip, the two girls went off together, and we parents headed back to our cars.

The next morning, NYU in London sent a van to Heathrow Airport for the students, although the kids had to get themselves and all their luggage (remember, they packed for an entire semester) to a specific location (which in Sarah’s case turned out to be a different terminal). The students figured out how to go through customs and to carry multiple suitcases (using carts available at the airport). It was a lot for them, but somehow they managed. Sarah called that afternoon to report that the flight went well and she had arrived safely. She would let us know more as soon as she could. NYU arranged for the students to call home as soon as they arrived—a welcome touch for both parents and students.

On to part three...